Check out my pics and videos from the trip!
Videos:
Kangaroos!
Waterfall in the Blue Mountains:
Intt and a Parrot at the Blue Mountains (sorry for being sideways):
Intt on the Ferry to Manly Beach:
My friends Siam and Meow went off to Bangkok to get married. A group of us decided to go to the ceremony and get a chance to see a part of the world we’d never been before. So, we bought the plane tickets and set off on our grand adventure!
LADYBOYS AND GRASSHOPPERS
Today is going to be fun. It’s time for a road trip! A big group of us are headed to Pattaya. It’s a city on the coast about and hour and a half from Bangkok. It’s a city that has a kind of bad reputation — you’ve heard of seedy things happening in Thailand? This is where it happens. Nevertheless, we will be joined on our trip with Siam’s mom and one of her friends. We pile into a van and head out to the highway.
Halfway to Pattaya, it’s lunch time. We stop at a rest stop on the side of the road — guess what’s for lunch? Khao Mun Gai! The stuff I loved so much from breakfast yesterday. We all order it, and I decide to splurge and have Coke from the bottle. It tastes good — like everywhere else except the US, it’s made with real sugar. There are eight of us on the trip. The meal costs a grand total of $12. Unbelievable.
We head back on the road, and before you know it, we’re in Pattaya. It’s a resort town for sure, and they are building gigantic condos everywhere. We’re headed to one such place now — one of the friends of Siam’s family owns a condo here and is gracious enough to let us visit for a while. But first, we stop by a fruit market — these places are everywhere, and everyone loves to eat fruit here.
We get lots of fruit, and this ain’t stuff you find in HEB. I don’t know half of the names of the fruit, but they are all tasty. I should also mention there’s a special fruit here in Thailand called durian. This looks a little like pineapple, but that’s where the similarities end. Once you open up durian, you start to smell it. It smells like garbage. Not only that, you can smell it from far away. We don’t get any durian this time, but in Phuket I got to taste some. It doesn’t taste bad, really. In fact, it’s pretty good. If you hold your nose, that is.
Once we’re loaded with fruit, we head to the condo. It’s really nice. It’s also very Western — you could just as easily be in California once you set foot in it. We greet the family who owns the condo (we met them originally at the wedding) and head out to the beach, which is just feet from the door. We wander around for a bit, hang out by the pool, and chow down on fruit. It’s nice.
After a while, it’s time to move on to central Pattaya. We pile back into the van, and move on. This is where all the go-go bars are. It’s also close to the show we’re going to see tonight: it’s called Alcazar. It’s a Vegas-style show, except all the performers are ladyboys. What’s a ladyboy? It’s a girl that used to be a guy. Or, a guy that’s in transition to becoming a girl. You get the idea. Ladyboys are part of the culture of Thailand, so you better just accept it. Anyway, as we’re driving in the van, we see two attractive Thai women drinking at a bar. Siam’s mom says, “Look! Mother and son!” We laugh.
Siam’s mom also thinks it will be entertaining to kick us out of the van and have us wander the streets while they speed off. So, the next thing you know, we’re headed out on foot. Everytime we pass a go-go bar, the girls all yell at us, kind of like catcalls. It’s a little crazy! One girl actually grabs my arm as we pass by. We’re starting to pick up a few key Thai phrases by now, and one useful one is, “Mai ow!”, which means “I’m not interested.” We say “mai ow” a lot on this street.
Jon’s had enough of the catcalls, and we duck into an English pub for a drink. We all order big pints of Tiger Beer, drink up, and then it’s back to the van for the show.
After a really quick meal — we’re running late for the show — we head in to Alcazar. The show begins, and the ladyboys take the stage.
The show material is pretty tame — it’s just lip-synched show tunes and dance numbers. But that’s okay, because the whole time you’re thinking, “if I met this person on the street, would I know it was a ladyboy?” A couple of them are really good looking, I have to admit. Alex seems to be taking a lot of pictures during the show.
After the show, you have the opportunity to take pictures with the performers in the parking lot. We all get pictures taken. It’s also an opportunity to hear their voices, and this is the real giveaway. They sound like dudes. They’re still cute, though.
After the show, it’s time to go back to Bangkok. We get back just in time to head out on the town again. We say goodbye to Siam’s mom, get dressed up, and head to RCA again. This time, Jon will be joining us, so that’s good news. We all meet at a place called Route 66. It’s very similar to the club we were at last night, but this time we get a real table. Also, this time Intt will be joining us. I heard through the grapevine (Intt -> Intt’s Mom -> Siam’s Mom -> Siam -> Me) that she liked me when we met a few days ago at Lizm. This is good news, and I’m pretty excited to see her again. The group orders a bottle of Johnnie Walker Black (again), and the music is good (again). Intt arrives and we dance and chat. Well, kinda. The music is really loud, and we can’t hear each other too well. I suggest we go outside and talk. She has another idea — she whips out her iPhone, and we chat by taking turns writing notes to each other on it.
We’re all having lots of fun. We actually end up going through two bottles of whiskey tonight. Before you know it, the house lights are on, and it’s time to leave. I walk Intt outside and say goodbye. This is the last time I see her. But, I have her email address, and it won’t be the last time I chat with her.
It’s 2:30 AM. Time to go home, right? Wrong. We head out to a night market. This is basically a version of the JJ Market, except it’s only open at night. It’s packed. People are selling all sorts of stuff. We wander around and find a place to eat. It’s also apparently time to drink more, as Kae finds a place that sells whiskey shots. So, we’re doing alright.
We wander around some more, and run into a stall selling fried insects. You heard me. They have all sorts of insects for your enjoyment. It’s almost 4AM at this point, we’re drunk, and in Bangkok. The group determines that there is no better time to eat an insect or two. So, we order up grasshoppers, and Neff orders up a scorpion. That’s right, a scorpion. We eat them. It’s…. not bad, actually. The grasshopper is crispy, and it’s been liberally coated with seasoning by the proprietor. Jon actually ends up eating three of them.
We can’t believe we just did that. It’s time to go home now.
My friends Siam and Meow went off to Bangkok to get married. A group of us decided to go to the ceremony and get a chance to see a part of the world we’d never been before. So, we bought the plane tickets and set off on our grand adventure!
BACK TO BANGKOK
It’s morning in Phuket, and most everyone meets outside the guest house for breakfast. Meow isn’t feeling well, and would rather sleep in. We wander around and end up in a little restaurant that’s around the corner.
Breakfast in Thailand is a little different than the breakfast Americans are used to — there’s no bacon or eggs or toast. To Thais, breakfast is a meal just like lunch or dinner, and the food is the same. Siam takes care of ordering the food.
They bring out a dish called Khao Mun Gai (”chicken rice”). This is basically boiled chicken served with rice cooked in chicken stock. Sound plain? It would be, except it’s served with a side of sauce. I can’t describe this sauce, but it’s basically a little slice of heaven on earth. It’s spicy and delicious. I pour the sauce on the chicken, and eat away. I clean my plate, and finish off the chicken broth soup that comes as a side. What an awesome breakfast! How much for this culinary delight? About a dollar.
We all clean up and head back to the airport. We’re going back to Bangkok! We say goodbye to Note, and get on the plane.
After an uneventful flight, we take a cab to our new digs, the Asia Hotel. This isn’t as nice as the first hotel we stayed at in Bangkok, but it’s a very convenient location — close to the Skytrain and Siam Square. Siam and Meow go back with their families, so Tang will be our escort today.
I should take a break here and talk about Bangkok. It’s different than a typical big city in America. I’ve mentioned the traffic before — it’s insane. But, the general city layout is different. The streets are lined with multi-story buildings. The first floor of every building is a shop. And in front of the shop is, invariably, several carts selling all types of food. Food is everywhere in Bangkok — you can’t go more than a few steps without smelling something cooking. There’s almost not enough room to walk on the sidewalk, because it’s full of food vendors!
Once we all get checked in, we head out to the street. We’re only a few blocks from the Jim Thompson House. This is a wooden home that was built by, you guessed it, Jim Thompson. He was an American expat who ended up in Thailand, and adopted their culture. He revived the Thai Silk industry, and built this house in the traditional Thai style. It’s very well done, and the tour of the home is entertaining — mainly because of our tour guide. She prefaces almost every sentence with the words, “Ladies and Gentlemen” in such a way that you think her next words are going to reveal the very secrets of life itself. In reality, she’s only pointing out that the porcelain figure on the floor is a chamberpot.
We hang around the grounds a bit, and enjoy a cold drink in the Jim Thompson restaurant. It’s very classy, and the air conditioning feels marvelous. Jon isn’t feeling too well at this point — he says his stomach is a little upset. We’re all a little tired at this point anyway, so we walk back to the hotel and take naps.
When we wake up, Jon still isn’t 100%, so we all go to dinner without him. We take the Skytrain to Siam Square and eat at the mall. This is probably the least exciting meal on the trip — what do you expect from mall food? I order some Tom Yum Gung. This is the same soup we had in Phuket that was so amazing. This version is a mere shadow of that soup. We eat our meals, get some water and bread for Jon, and head back to the hotel.
Jon’s still in bed. He’s out for the night. However, this doesn’t stop us from going out and having fun. Kae (Meow’s maid of honor in the wedding) picks us up and takes us out on the town. At first, we go to a section of town that’s just crawling with farang. This isn’t our scene at all, so Kae takes us to a street called RCA (Royal City Avenue). This is something like Sixth Street here in Austin, except the clubs are much bigger. It’s also free from farang, so we’re happy. We go to a place called Slim. It’s a club that has some good DJs. All the tables are full, but those crafty Thais have a solution — they have little tiny rolling tables that are big enough to hold whiskey and mixers, and that’s about it. They set up a rolling table in the middle of the club, and we start drinking Johnnie Walker Black. Sitting is not an option, which is okay, because the music is good. Kae and friends want to be entertained, so they mix up a few strong drinks for me and push me out to go dance with the neighboring girls. It’s fun, though.
We stay out until closing time, and head back to the hotel. I like Bangkok.
I’m going to take a quick break from recounting our trip to Thailand to tell you about our Uchi experience.
Siam and Meow are in town for Memorial Day. We’d really like to see them move down from Dallas, so we’ve been giving them the hard sell of Austin. Last night we did margaritas at Freddie’s, went to see the bats, and had Thai Passion for dinner. Today, we went to Hamilton Pool, went to Home Slice (best pizza in Austin), and went shopping on South Congress.
For dinner, we went to Uchi. I’d never been before, but my book on Austin restaurants rated it as the best restaurant in the city. Six of us went, and it wasn’t too much of a wait before we had a table. Plus, we got to warm up with some sake at the bar.
Uchi is one of the few places in Austin where you can order family style. They bring out the dishes, place them in the middle of the table, and everyone digs in with their chopsticks. The family style concept is one of my favorite things I enjoyed about Thailand. All meals are served this way. Everyone gets a chance to sample all different types of food, and it’s fun to boot. It really also is a good bonding experience. If you go to a typical restaurant in America, everyone orders their own dish, and someone orders something that you like better, well, you’ll have to order it next time you’re there. That doesn’t happen in Thailand.
We order a bunch of different dishes, and the flood of food begins. Uchi is a sushi restaurant, by the way. I’ve had a decent amount of sushi here (and some in Tokyo), so I’m familiar with what to expect. Jon’s girlfriend, Connolly, has never had sushi before, and is a little leery.
The first dish comes out, and it’s amazing. The next dish comes out — also amazing. In fact, we have about 15 different sushi, sashimi, and beef dishes, and they’re all spectacular. The presentation is perfect, and our waiter prefaces every dish with a description of all ingredients and the best way to eat it. Every piece of fish seems to melt in my mouth. I think it’s safe to say Uchi deserves its rating.
Big props to Jon for treating us all. Even his girlfriend says she likes sushi now. I’m still basking in the afterglow of the meal, and I don’t want to put anything else in my mouth, lest I ruin any remaining tastes on my tongue.
If you’re in Austin, you need to go here. Plus, it’s less than two miles from my house. Come visit, and I’ll take you!
My friends Siam and Meow went off to Bangkok to get married. A group of us decided to go to the ceremony and get a chance to see a part of the world we’d never been before. So, we bought the plane tickets and set off on our grand adventure!
SWIMMING WITH THE FISHES
We wake up around 7 and meet up at the hotel’s free breakfast. The breakfast is good, and we’re the only ones there. Apparently people here like to sleep in.
Good news! The rain and clouds from the day before are gone, and it’s a beautiful day. After a little discussion, we decide charter a boat trip to go around the islands. We all pile into a boat and take off.
The waters are a little choppy at points, and we’re getting all getting a kick out of the boat jumping up and crashing down back to the water. Well, all of us except for Meow, who is in a life vest and hanging on for dear life to the edge of the boat. Every time we hit the water, she lets out a little scream, which amuses us even more. Even the driver is laughing.
Our first stop is a picture-perfect cove. We’re surrounded by mountains and the water is clear. I start singing the theme to Jurassic Park. We lay anchor in the middle of the cove and start snorkeling. It’s really quite an experience! The boat driver tosses some bread in the water near us, and the next thing you know, we’re surrounded by fish. I’m not exactly sure what type they are — they’re striped green and yellow, and they love bread. I’ll call them breadfish. We snorkel and swim around for a while. We’re the only ones in the cove, and it’s really peaceful. The boat driver signals that it’s time for the next stop of the tour, so we all pile back in.
Next up is Ma Ya Bay, which is a really cool island with a really nice beach. In fact, I’m googling this right now, and apparently the movie ‘The Beach’ was filmed at Ma Ya Bay! I guess I should watch that sometime. Anyway, the beach is really crowded with white people. We hang out on the beach for a bit, and then explore the island. It’s got one path that leads to toilets, a private house, and to the beach on the other side. That beach is not nearly as pretty, but we’re the only ones there, so that’s nice. We walk back, swim for a bit, and we’re back on the boat.
We stop for more snorkeling. This time, there’s some really nice coral to view, along with the fish. The current is also pretty strong. I look up after a couple minutes of snorkeling, and the boat is about a hundred feet away. I swim back toward the boat. Once I get there, I see Alex far away, and he looks concerned. He’s having a small panic attack and asks for a life vest. Jon swims out to him with the vest, and the driver moves the boat toward him. He gets back on the boat with little trouble — crisis averted!
After that excitement, we decide to head back to the main island. We have lunch and hang out by the pool until it’s time for the ferry back to Phuket. The trip back is much nicer than the one earlier — no annoying Britons on this one!
Note meets us back on Phuket. She works for her family’s travel agency, and we go to their office, which is in the lobby of the hotel where we’re staying tonight. We check in, and then take a walk to Patong Beach. This is a huge beach — it reminds me a lot of Acapulco. The surf feels good on my bare feet. We take a long stroll — it’s relaxing and it’s nice to see locals hanging out and playing, not just tourists.
Dinner time! Note has something special in store for us. She knows of a restaurant that serves dinner ‘Phuket-style’. It used to be a house, but it’s been converted to a restaurant. We arrive, and the atmosphere is really cool. It almost has a feel of a Southern plantation, complete with Victrola in the corner. The woman cooking for us comes out and has me taste the curry to see if it’s too hot for my sensitive American tongue. I tell her to make it hotter. Thai people don’t think we can handle any spice!
The meal is good — what else would you expect at this point? I’m really starting to get into Thai food. When I first started the trip, I thought I’d be craving a cheeseburger after a few days, but I could eat this food forever! In fact, the last thing I want to eat at this point is American food.
After the meal, it’s time for some fun — karaoke! We go to a really nice karaoke bar and walk into our room. If you’re familiar with the movie Lost in Translation, you realize they do karaoke different in Asia. You rent a private room and sing with your friends — not in front of everyone. It’s more fun this way. We order a bottle of whiskey (see a pattern here?) and start singing. We all get into it, thanks to the liquid courage being served up by our waitress, a Thai girl in schoolgirl outfit. It’s especially fun to see Note and Meow sing Thai songs. Some of those songs are catchy!
We head back to the hotel — it’s pretty late by this point, and we’re all a little inebriated. Thailand is fun!
So, today was a pretty significant day — I stepped on my scale and it said 179.6! This is the first time I’ve been below 180 in probably a year and a half — and it’s the first milestone on my diet. As of February 10th, I’ve been watching my caloric intake and lifting weights three times a week. I started out at around 191 or 192 (I had a cheap scale at the time, so I’m not entirely positive what my heaviest weight was). Since then, I’ve been steadily losing weight and I’m enjoying watching the belly go bye-bye. My goal is to get around 170, then I’m going to start the next phase of my diet: bulking. Hopefully, I’ll be gaining mostly muscle during that time. We’ll have to wait and see, though, because I still have probably another 1.5-2 months before I get there.
Anyway, on February 10th, I gave up Cokes, fast food, and my sedentary lifestyle. I’m allowing myself one ‘eat-out’ meal a week, and that’s my traditional Monday lunch with my friends. All other meals are homemade, and my diet consists of mainly the following:
Turkey
Chicken Breasts
Tuna
Salmon
Whole wheat bread
Peas
Corn
Green beans
Broccoli
Salad Mix
Olive Oil
Low-sodium nuts
Pretzels
Nitrean protein powder
Skim milk
Egg Beaters
Mrs. Dash
A good multi-vitamin
I’ve become pretty decent in the kitchen in the meantime, which is an added benefit of forcing myself to cook pretty much every meal. I’m pretty excited to be finally getting back to healthy again! I’ll keep you posted as I continue to improve!
Growing up, breakfast was not exactly a family affair. Every week, my mother would stock the pantry and fridge full of Little Debbie and Hostess snacks. This is what I would have for breakfast. My favorites were chilled Hostess cup cakes and Choco-Bliss, along with a glass of milk. While eating my dessert for breakfast, I would read the comics. Even then, I knew they weren’t funny, but yet I would read every strip every morning… that is, except for those stupid soap opera strips.
Fast forward to the present: The comics are still not funny. But what is truly funny is the Comics Curmudgeon, a website that makes fun of the funnies. I’ve been reading this site for months, and it could be my favorite site to visit. Well, as it turns out, I was missing out on all the fun all these years — the soap opera comics are by far the most interesting! Take Mary Worth, for instance. The current plotline is that this younger man starts stalking Mary and tries to woo her. The backstory on this character is that his first wife drowned in her bathtub while he was passed out drunk. Back to the present — he’s annoying Mary so much that his ‘friends’ have an intervention and tells him to stay away. So he does — he goes straight to the liquor store and is now drinking and driving. Will he end up killing another?
Or take Judge Parker. The current story is that one of the daughters ‘outsourced’ her homework to a man in India who thinks she wants to marry him. So he comes over to the States and discovers she’s about 13 years old. And this Indian man is really nerdy, so the daughters have decided to give him a makeover.
I enjoy these two comics so much, I wrote a script that pulls the latest strips so I can view them on my site. Check them out!